The Right Kind of Wrong Read online

  Unless she loved Charlie back.

  CHAPTER TWENTY-FIVE

  I stack the letters back into the box and look at Vince. "He was in love with her. He truly believed she'd ask him to come back."

  "I know."

  "Do you think she loved him back? Did she even love my grandfather at all?"

  "I don't know, Kara. You're gonna have to talk to her."

  I nod. This has gone on long enough. I'm ready for the truth. Even if Grandma isn't.

  "Okay. Let's go talk to her then."

  Downstairs, my grandmother is in her rocking chair, reading. She looks at us when we reach the bottom of the stairs.

  I need to do this now or my nerves will get the best of me. "We need to talk, Grandma." I set the box in her lap and watch as she puts it together.

  She lowers her head and touches the letters with her hands, wrinkled and spotted with age spots.

  "My God. How did you…?" Her voice is a well of emotion ready to erupt. "I guess it doesn't matter how found out, only that you did. Honey, I'm sorry you had to find out this way. I hoped it'd never come to this."

  "What happened with Charlie? He loved you, but you didn't love him back, right?" Grandma leans back in the chair and her tears begin to fall.

  "It's a very long story, dear."

  "Please, tell me," I plead with her.

  Grandma wipes the tears from her cheeks. "Charlie had his eyes on me the night Wesley introduced us. Charlie was quite the charmer back then. He could talk a girl into just about anything. But I didn't fall for it right away. It's why I was attracted to Wesley. He wasn't concerned with being someone he wasn't. He was an honest man who wanted a woman who would take him for what he was. I admired that. It reminded me of my own father." She sips her water before she continues.

  "Lord, Wesley was stubborn. When the war started, he wouldn't listen to anything I had to say. He told me his country needed him and he was enlisting for his family, for his future children to be free. He was so passionate it was hard to talk him out of anything."

  "So where does Charlie play into all of this?"

  "I'm getting there, child. You already know how much James hated me. Wesley was putting in such long hours at the company before he left for the war. He was hardly around. And when he was, he still wasn't fully here. I missed my husband. I missed the man I fell for. Charlie would come around for dinner and to visit. One day, he came over and said he was dropping off some paperwork for Wesley. He asked me a question I couldn't avoid any longer. If I hadn't answered him, maybe life would have turned out differently."

  "What did he ask you?"

  "He asked if I loved Wesley."

  "And what was your answer?" I'm not sure I want to know.

  "I'd been so mad at Wesley the last few weeks and I suppose in that moment, I hesitated out of spite. Charlie didn't take it like that. He thought my hesitation meant that my heart was open to him. I promised myself I'd never hurt Wesley. I'd never betray him. But I was weak and selfish. Before I knew what was happening, we were spending time together in secret."

  "Oh, Grandma. How could you do that?" My eyes glaze over with the all-too-familiar wetness I've experienced all week.

  My grandmother shakes her head. "I don't know. I was a stupid, stupid woman."

  "Did you love him?"

  My grandmother is silent and I have my answer.

  "What happened to Charlie? Why did he leave?"

  Grandma sighs. "Right before your grandfather went to war, I realized how stupid and careless I was being. I told Charlie we needed to end it but by that time I was wrapped up in everything and didn't know how to stop. He was the right kind of wrong, if that makes sense. I knew he wasn't what I wanted and yet—I felt free when I was with him. He made me feel alive in a way Wesley couldn't. I felt so young and carefree when I was around him. It was intoxicating. It was only a matter of time before Charlie and I were careless enough to get caught by James." She closes her eyes, like it is all unfolding again in real time.

  "Sometime after your grandfather left for war, James came out here and confronted me about the affair. I tried to deny it but then Charlie showed up, which only set James off more. Charlie said he was tired of holding in the secret. He loved me and wanted us to run away together. But that's the thing—I couldn't. I couldn’t run away with him. I loved him, but I loved Wesley more. I loved them... differently. It's very hard to explain. James told Charlie if he didn't leave Everson immediately, he would find his own way to get rid of him. I think Charlie would've fought him on that, but it's what James said he would do to me that made Charlie leave."

  "What's that?" I prod.

  "He said that if Charlie didn't leave—and if I ever told anyone about the affair—that he'd find a way to get rid of me. Permanently."

  "But he couldn't do that! That would be murder." I say, even though our conversation with the Corrigan's leads me to believe this was a reality.

  Grandma shakes her head, "James was very cruel. He had this entire community in his back pocket. He could have gotten away with it. Charlie knew he was serious."

  "Why was James so adamant about hiding things? Why not expose you two?"

  "The only thing worse than having an adulterous daughter-in-law is allowing the entire community to know about it. James knew what it would do to Wesley. I can't explain it but the only soft spot that man had was Wesley. Even though he was all about appearances, he truly did love Wesley."

  "But not Charlie? What kind of father is that?"

  Grandma rubs her finger over the address on the envelopes. "I don't know. That's why I felt so bad for Charlie. Why I wanted to protect him somehow. Make up for what he never received from his father."

  "So that's it then? Charlie leaves because James threatens you?"

  "It all seems so simple now, but it wasn't. Not then. Not when something like this would scandalize the entire family. Charlie and I could've destroyed the entire Pierce name with our indiscretion."

  "What about these letters?"

  Grandma's head falls. "I received a letter from him shortly after he left. He'd set up a postal box at the train station in Rosterville. I went there and checked for his letters when I went to town. After his first letter, I was so afraid James would find out I was communicating with him, I almost never sent one back."

  "When was the last time you talked to him?" I ask.

  "I stopped answering his letters after his third one. I couldn't do it. I knew it wasn't fair to either of them. I had to choose. And I did. I chose Wesley."

  "So that's it? You just let him out of your life and expected everything to be okay? How could you hurt Grandpa like that? I can't even—"

  Grandma looks at her lap and cries harder. "There's more."

  "What?"

  "After Charlie left, I found out I was pregnant." She can barely talk. "Kara, I was pregnant with your father."

  I don't understand. But I zero in on the word father and it hits me like a shot to the heart. I shake my head. "Oh my God."

  CHAPTER TWENTY-SIX

  I look at Vince to steady myself. When he comes into focus, I don't know what to do except run.

  So I do.

  I run out of the house and through the backyard. I know I'll reach the creek and have to search for the stupid rock path to get over it but I don't care. I have to get away, leave what I just heard behind. But I won't be able to forget it because it changes things. No, it changes everything.

  After I jump rock to rock over the creek and make it to the other side, I collapse on the same rock I spent so much time sitting on during high school. I'd come here to think. The exact opposite of what I want to do now. But it feels like home, so I sit.

  I try to slow my breathing, which is hard because I can't stop the sobs.

  I slam my fist down on the rock, and it hurts. I like it. "Fuck!" I do it again. "Fuck, fuck, fuck!" I want to rub the hurt out of my fist but at the same time, I don't because it helps me avoid thinking about how much of a lie
my life has been. How much of a lie my grandfather lived through. I squeeze my eyes shut, willing the tears to subside.

  I hear cracking twigs and sloshing water. "Kara?" I don't say anything. "Kara, I know you're around here, I followed you."

  "I'm over here."

  A minute later, I see Vince wading through the creek, most of him soaked. He has leaves in his hair and a terrified look on his face. I can't help but smile at how absurd the sight is.

  He seems relieved when he sees me. I move over to share my rock.

  "How'd you get through without getting wet?"

  "Hidden path."

  He nods. "Of course." He takes the sleeve of his jacket and wipes the tears from my cheeks.

  "Pretty rough stuff, huh?"

  "That's an understatement." He pulls me close and I rest my head on his shoulder. I try to calm myself. Breathe in. Breathe out. With Vince's arms around me, my muscles become limp and lifeless. I indulge in the warmth his skin provides me and I count the seconds between my heartbeats until I can pull away from him, my breaths steady.

  "What do I do now?" I whisper.

  He runs his hands through my hair and kisses my forehead. "I can't answer that."

  I clench my fist. "I'm so angry right now, I can't think straight."

  "I know it's none of my business—"

  "You're right, it's not."

  "Dammit, Kara. I was going to say that it's none of my business but whatever you want to do, we'll do. We've come this far to find the truth though, there's only one thing left to do."

  I breathe in and let out a loud sigh. "We need to find Charlie, don't we?"

  He nods. "I think so."

  "And say what? Hey, Charlie, you know that time you slept with your brother's wife? Well she ended up knocked up with your kid. And I'm your granddaughter. Surprise!"

  "Well, not in those words exactly, but yeah," Vince says.

  "We don't even know if he's alive."

  "It can't hurt to try and find him. Don't you think he deserves to know the truth too? The guy's been walking around almost his entire life without knowing he has a kid."

  "You know what I don't get? How my grandmother could stand beside a man who risked his life for her freedom and know the entire time what she'd done to him."

  "I'm not trying to say what your grandmother did was right but I think she was trying to protect your grandfather and ultimately, your father."

  His words ripple through me. My father. He had no idea. I look at Vince; the tears threaten again. "Shit. My father. I can't tell him. I won't tell him."

  Vince doesn't say anything.

  "You think I should tell him?"

  "I didn't say anything."

  "You didn't have to. But you don't know anything about my father. He's like James—he only cares about money and himself."

  "I think you're being a little dramatic. I think he's probably going to take this as hard as you. I mean, we're talking about his real father here."

  I stand up and move away from him. I can't do this. Not if he's on my father's side. He can't bat for both teams.

  "Kara, stop. You are feeling really emotional right now, let's just talk." He tries to grab my arm but I move out of reach.

  "I'm done talking, Vince." I turn and run. I run until I'm back in the house. I hear Grandma call my name. I ignore her, climb the stairs and lock myself in the bedroom. I crawl in bed and pull the covers around me, letting them cocoon me in their warmth.

  The tears fall freely again. I cry for my grandfather who loved a woman so much it blinded him. I cry for Charlie, who was completely in the wrong, but never knew he was a father or a grandfather. I even let a few tears fall for my father because even though he hasn't been the kind of father he should have been, his entire life has been a lie, too. Just like mine.

  When there's not a tear that can possibly be squeezed out, I slide out from the covers. I don't know what I'm looking for but when I see Vince's handheld camera on the dresser, I know what I want to do.

  I unscrew the cap, open the lens, and when I position it just right, I push the record button. I sit on the bed and look at it blankly for a few minutes before I start talking.

  "My name is Kara Pierce and I came back to Everson to research my grandfather's service in WWII. What I found instead was his missing twin, their evil father and a forbidden love affair. My entire life, I knew Wesley Pierce as my grandfather, the man who fought in World War II, saved countless lives and then came home to save mine. But the truth is—Wesley isn't my real grandfather. I don't even know my real grandfather. I do know that he loved my grandmother enough to betray his brother. I know that he might still be alive—waiting. Waiting to know the truth? That's what I'm going to find out. I’m going to find him and bring him home. I want to hear his side of the story. I want him to know he's a father. A grandfather. A person who deserves to come home, no matter what his own father said or did."

  I look at my lap and wonder if I'm missing anything. If there's anything else I should say. I wonder why I'm telling this to a camera. Maybe it's for posterity. Or maybe it's so I can remember this moment when everything is done.

  Now, it's time to find Charlie.

  The morning comes and I don't remember falling asleep. I'm on top of the covers, still dressed. Then I remember yesterday.

  I get ready to face the day and when I reach the kitchen, Vince is dressed and cooking breakfast.

  "Morning," he says when he sees me.

  "Hi." I make a beeline for the coffee. "Where's Grandma?"

  "She went to see Parker for a little bit."

  "Oh."

  "Not that you care right now, but she’s not doing very well."

  I raise an eyebrow. "Yeah? Well, why should she be fine about this? It's mostly her fault.”

  He doesn't agree, but turns his back and continues cooking. I take my coffee out to the front porch. The clouds look like sad, grey mashed potatoes in the sky and the drizzling rain creates a haze around the porch. I cradle my coffee for warmth and think about finding Charlie. I don't know what I'll do if I can't find him—or worse, if he's already gone. I'll never get a chance to know him. I wonder what it was like for him to leave. Where did he go? Did he have anywhere to stay? My mind cycles through scenarios. My life would be different if he'd stayed.

  Dust and gravel gather on the path and Grandma's Cadillac emerges through the cloud. My instincts tell me to get up before she makes it to the porch but I stay. I shouldn't have to walk away. I steady myself for what I know is coming. She sees me as she approaches the porch and sits on the swing next to me.

  "You know I love you, right?" she says.

  "I know."

  "You know I'd never do anything to intentionally hurt you."

  "I know that, but this? It really hurts."

  She puts her arm around me and scoots so we're hip to hip. "I know it does, sweetheart. And I will never be able to tell you how sorry I am. You may never forgive me, and I have to live with that. But I couldn't live with you thinking that I don't love you. And your grandfather—Lord, that man loved you more than anything else in this world."

  Don't cry. Don't cry. Don't cry.

  The tears fall and splash on Grandma's wrist. I've cried more in the last few days than I've cried since Grandpa passed away. I wipe the tears, sniffle and sit up straight.

  "We're going to find him."

  "Who?"

  "Charlie."

  "Oh, honey. I don't think that's a good idea."

  I look her in the eyes and see my face looking back. "I have to do this. And you owe it to everyone involved. Especially Charlie, if he's still alive. He deserves to know he has a kid."

  "It's been so long, he probably doesn't want anything to do with me. And your father—he doesn't even know."

  "Charlie's last letter was dated two years ago, and he made it pretty apparent he still loves you. And as far as Dad goes—you're gonna have to tell him."

  "I'm not sure I can." She stares out at the su
nrise.

  "You have to. I love you Grandma, but you've held this secret for way too long. It's time to come clean. "

  She sighs. "I know."

  I think about the nights when I was little and I had trouble falling asleep. My grandparents would tuck me into bed. They had a saying that always put me at ease. When I get up from the swing and head for the door, I stop before I go in. "Whatever happens, Grandma, I want you to know that you still hung the moon and Grandpa placed the stars."

  She closes her eyes and whispers, "Thank you, Kara."

  Vince has a plate of eggs and bacon waiting for me when I walk in. I sit at the table and dig in.

  "You talk to her?" he asks.

  "A little bit."

  "That's good. So, what are the plans?"

  "I think we should start with the envelope. It's got a return address on it, right?"

  "What if he's not there?"

  I shrug. "Then we figure it out from there."

  "When are we leaving?"

  I look at the clock on the wall. "In less than an hour. We only have a few days left before we have to go back to California."

  "Guess you better eat faster," he says with a grin.

  For the first time since I learned the truth, a genuine smile takes the place of my well-worn frowns. "Guess so."

  After I inhale my food and make myself presentable for the day, I pack the photo album I showed Vince, swipe Charlie's letters and meet Vince at the car. He's sitting in the driver’s seat and I give him an unsavory look.

  "What are you doing?"

  "I figured it wouldn't be fair to let you have all the driving fun."

  I roll my eyes. "You didn't want to die with me at the wheel."

  "That too. Get in and let's go."

  He sends gravel and rock flying as we speed down the path. Grandma is still sitting on the porch swing, her face blank, her shoulders slumped. I turn in my seat and try to get the image out of my head. Vince shoves the GPS in my hand.